Construction and its related fields of real estate, architecture, and interior design offer an opportunity to get coerced like no other. And it is ironic that those who are most together in other aspects of their lives abdicate their free will in the face of a skilled bully. I assume this is because of the risk, uncertainty, and relative lack of knowledge people have with regards to buildings and their fabrication and maintenance. They are full of primal fear and hoping that someone can make it all ok. And the good ones can.
The following categories apply to contractors, architects, interior designers, realtors, consultants and the like, though some are far more likely in one field than another.
There is the role the professional is supposed to play and there is the unfortunate role they can play. At their best they are indispensible for protecting assets, maximizing efforts, and lifting the process up to something experiential and sublime. Unfortunately bad things can happen to good people. Here are some personalities to stay away from.
The know it all snake oil sales man who steps in and handles everything (even before he is asked), also known as the Alexander Haig (Reagan’s secretary of state who announced he was in charge about three people down the chain of command early). They love to tell you how in hand they have things and they have a proprietary and franchised method/system/tool that does exactly what you need. Most commonly specialty contractors like 24 hour plumbers/rooter services but can be anyone with a horse to flog. In commercial projects it is the heating and air conditioning guys. Anyone who sells directly to the owner and does not like to share and play well with others.
The man handler who tells you what you’re going to do. Everything is in the imperative form flowing the wrong way. The hall mark of this personality is being short, pushy, or testy during the honey moon. Calls to see when you are going to start, despite clearly telling him you would let him know. Assuming they have the job and trying to secure a start date before the job is bid. Minor delays and set backs (which are the norm in construction) eliciting attitude and anger. And when that is questioned or any resistance is developed to their leaning in on you they go to the taunt. What are you broke? You cheap pussy. The cliché general contractor.
The passive aggressive who makes you feel like you don’t belong. They are supercilious souls that are so casual and comfortable with the very finest of everything that you quite naturally are somewhat uncomfortable by contrast. There can be pleasant smiles and good moments, but you always have the feeling that everything is an effort and if only you understood how out of your depth you were. Almost any effort to suggest something more reasonable or value driven is met with the refrain “If you’re comfortable with that.” Typically effete high-end design types.
The passive passive aggressive who dares you to make things uncomfortable, glibly pushing onward detached from the enormous and often erroneous billing going on. Le Mat, the fool and the first card of the tarot, emboldened and intrepid in his pursuit of his bliss at your expense. Usually someone who has a vision that they are solely responsible for. Often takes a parent child approach to the professional client relationship. When it is the project they are the parent and you are the child and when it is money they are the child and you arethe parent.
The alpha nag who explains the rules. To watch one in action is a truly unholy thing. You can observe the most accomplished together woman imaginable transport and transform back to their sophomore year in high school before your very eyes. Everyone is doing this. No one is doing that. You have to have this. You can’t have that. It is like watching one of those hypnotists at work in theater. Or maybe more like the Manchurian candidate. They do not like men because the Heather’s number they run does not work well if you have no interest in wearing the red ribbon. Sadly this is almost every interior designer I have ever met.
The charlatan who knows wealthy people don’t like to admit they made a mistake and are terrified their peers will find out. This is often the person that you absolutely have to use. EVERYONE in your social set has used them. They might even be at the party, but they are the “it” guy or girl. Things start fine, but at key moments everything seems horribly, privately a mess and things are coming off the rails. Important thing are not addressed or communicated. Important documents go unread and it translates in eleventh hour crisis and huge costs. Then you find out from your friends “Oh yeah, they are really bad about that.” And there you are with the rest of your friends extolling the virtues, too ashamed to share the reality of the financial STD you picked up. But hey, you all have it so its all good. Ranges from prestige realtors to elite designers.
The pretentious incompetent , the poor retarded cousin of the charlatan, also known as the corn snake, who looks the part but fails to deliver the goods. The poor client faced with the fact that they paid for $1,300.00 - $13,000.00 of worthless advice only to realize they didn’t need them or their own ideas are better. Quite often people feel compelled to do the least offensive and most innocuous ideas in order to avoid accepting the mistake. All sizzle and no steak. The domain of consultants, independent draftsmen, and unlicensed contractors.
My philosophy is it is your house, home, property. Trust the people you hire to do a good job when ever possible. But if you find yourself compromised or in a bad situation, get out.
